Dear Business, I've had more than my fair share of rites of passage. Can you maybe save me the one where I have to learn that "medical practice" and "place of healing" is a synonym for "business"?*

Anyone who's been reading this blog for three weeks or more will be aware of the time I had to write a four-letter crusade against the business who denied me a non-prescription ECP. And I'm sure that post probably made me sound very self-righteous. Whatever. I got my pill, I sent my letters, and now my crusade is done.

Something equally affronting happened today, though. Those of you who've seen my feet know that they are by many definitions HIDEOUS. And this was the second professional I consulted to ameliorate the appearance of my still-HIDEOUS feet.

Professional 2 explained that the hideousness of the feet will more than likely remain intact, but that said hideousness was also normal.

"Normal?" I said, politely surprised, "other women do not have feet like these!"

Said he, "Yes well other women don't have your good looks." (A comment that no matter how innocently-put never sounds quite right coming from a doctor.)

Professionals 1 (two at the same clinic) had made me $750 worth of orthodics which I've been wearing dutifully. I had explained to Professionals 1 that I have zero dollars in health insurance (true), and as I not-too-cheaply put it, I'd appreciate knowing ahead of time if in their opinion I was spending more than they felt was neccessary just to get the problem solved.

And Professional 2 spelled out for me, in just the right number of words, how I'd just thrown that $750 down the drain at a shifty (mal)practice.

$750.
750 tacos.
600 packs of gum.
125 Caesars.

Notes:
*"place of healing" is a synonym for "business": Before I went for a massage therapy once I asked mum if I was supposed to tip the RMT for his or her work, and she replied that no I shouldn't because it would be the equivalent of tipping a doctor. Funny that on subsequent visits to a Sutherland-Chan massage therapy clinic I saw a tip jar at the front desk.